1: BLOGGING – THE INNOVATIVE WRITER
Mark knew for a certainty what he would write for the week’s blog posting. He shared much with Simon Schama. Why write a boring old blog posting about a dusty, dry book when he could use his substantial intellectual gifts to infuse blog writing with new life and vigor. Of course he would have to invent a whole new approach to blog writing. He considered carefully the important elements: historians speculating about the motivations of important persons long since dead, the “myth” of historical certainty, and differences between the medium of documentary film and the written word. Yes, this would indeed be a revolutionary undertaking. The only question was, which writing tool would he use to begin his writing – the computer, the pencil, or the typewriter?
2: TYPEWRITER – A PEDESTRIAN TOOL
The invention of the future. That is what they called him for decades. He was the tool of choice for writers and serious journalists. But these newfangled “computers” were getting all the attention now. The unwashed masses were using these new, uncouth “PC” devices for their youtube and their facebook and God knows what else. Well, if the computer wanted to be the tool of lowly, common, Irish rogues, so be it. What really irked Typewriter is that this “Computer” was passing itself off as a genuine academic instrument. Bah! After he had lent his good name to the QWERTY keyboard system! He certainly wouldn’t be fooled and someday they would all see Computer for the charlatan he really was.
3: PENCIL – UTENSIL OF HONEST LABOR
Sketching. That was what people thought about the function of pencils now, and sketching ain’t get no good respect. Sure, folks would “sketch” their ideas with graphite and paper, but then they would write with their fancy keyboards which got all the glory. They thought Pencil was only good for a rough draft, not serious intellectual labor.
Pencil knew all about the writing process and when Typewriter showed up missing, pencil rolled off of the desk to examine the floor. There (gasp) he saw a grisly sight. Three typewriter keys lay jauntily askew. The keys “O,” “M,” and “G” lay at disturbingly odd angles as if screaming their shock and surprise to textmessagers everywhere.
4. COMPUTER – 1DRS WHAT 2 DO?
“Ah Typewriter, I’m glad U R here” said Computer, slipping into the less formal written form to which he had become accustomed. “I realize that I promised to footnote you in my latest article, but I’m having a little trouble with my…..er……..um……….wordprocessing program.”
“That is it!” exclaimed Typewriter. I will expose you for the Wikipedia-copying, Google searching, plagiarist that you are!”
“Please Typewriter, be KEWL ’bout this” stammered Computer but he knew it was no use. He could see only one way to save his public honor and it involved murder most foul!”
5. THE GENIUS BLOGGER
“What a great Blog entry I have written” thought Mark. “All this brouhaha with the murder is interesting, but I’m certain everyone wants to know more about how I came up with this wonderful, new approach to blog writing. You know, that would make a great movie..